Blurs and Sways...

So, I've been kind of thinking about what to write in my blog all week.

I make it a point to not be too personal on here. Why? I don't know. Scratch that. I do know. Because I've been burned in the past. And why on earth would I want that to happen again?

A smile is something that, over the years, has become easier and easier for me to tack onto my face. It's become far too easy for me to grin and bear it. This point in my life is no different.

Have you ever been in a subway station and you're standing there, still as day, and everything around you is spinning so fast? You're motionless, and the train, the people who know their destination, the people getting on and off the train, are all moving so fast. So fast that you couldn't even capture it with film and if you tried, it'd be just blurs of bright colors and sways of neon light.

I'm the inanimate one.

I feel like I'm at a standstill. I see all this going on around me, all these people planning and going and doing. And I'm like a statue. Never changing, never going.

Why??

What have I done to deserve the stalemate?

Yeah, you reap what you sow. I get it. Maybe I haven't reaped the very best roots, plants, whatever you want to call them (obviously, I don't garden), but really! I try. I try to do the best thing for everyone, I bust my ass to get ahead, and I try to look out for my interests along with the others that surround me.

Why isn't it time for me to be the blur?

But then again, what's so great about being the blur?

Maybe this is my time to sit back and watch the world and learn from other people's mistakes so I don't have to make them myself.