How Many Different Names can I Make up so I Don't Have to say the V Word?

First off, let's just say it's been an interesting week.

It's my second to last week of work, I seriously sucked it up at softball on Wednesday, and the Wiener dog is on his new "healthy weight" dog food, but otherwise, it's been a great week. Except when I woke up with an earache this morning, which just kind of added to my already apparent pain because I pulled my groin on Wednesday.

Yes.

You heard right.

I pulled my groin. Which is basically like saying I broke my hoo-ha. And it hurts, like, wayyyy bad.

I have no idea what happened. I woke up Monday with a dull pain, but it wasn't noticeable enough to worry about. It went away by Tuesday, so I did some P90X yoga and went on my merry little way. No biggie. Well, apparently my cooch had something otherwise to say about that. Wednesday, before my softball game, it started hurting a decent amount. Kind of like it was saying "Yo, Caralee, I'm kinda struggling down here at the moment, so are you sure you wanna play softball? Because I really don't think you do." But I did anyways, of course.

Yeah, well, that just made her mad (I can't believe I just called my tooch a "her" and made her talk in the last couple sentences). I got done playing and the adrenaline wore off and all of a sudden OHMYGAH WHAT IS THAT PAIN NEAR MY HOO-HOO?!?!?! I stumbled to my car from the field and sat down (with great pain) and tried to figure out what just happened. I still don't really understand? I mean, yeah I ran some, and yeah I caught (and missed) some balls, but really? Is that so deserving of all this?!

Needless to say, since, I've been wobbling around like some 80-year-old that needs a walker, but refuses to get one.

And, also. If somebody has the nerve to ask me why I'm walking as if one leg is longer than the other, what do I even say? "Shove it. I have a pulled groin and if you don't want to know how it feels, then I suggest you go on wit ya bad self". Ha. Yeah, right.